February 24, 2021

Peacefulness Tip: The Power of our Breath

The past year has given us all plenty of things to stress about. And when we become a ball of stress, it’s vitally important to take care of ourselves. But, that’s easier said than done. For most of us, when the work day is done, we’re exhausted and just want a break. But there are some small things that we can do to help bring a little peacefulness to our day. Like tonglen, which is a simple form of meditation that is easy to practice and can help relieve the burden many of us feel.

Tonglen is taken from Richard Rohr’s Center for Action and Contemplation. It’s a wonderful method of uniting our human hearts in common suffering and sending our own healing intentions into the world. We’ve all experienced many ups and down as the pandemic has impacted our lives, but it’s important to remember that we remain united in this as a whole human race.

This version of tonglen is from Tibetan Buddhist teacher, Pema Chödrön. Be gentle with yourself as you try this practice and know that we are not holding or healing the pain of the world ourselves; we are simply breathing in and out with the one breath of our loving God. As Chödrön describes:

We begin to feel love for both ourselves and others; we begin to take care of ourselves and others

Tonglen practice, also known as “taking and sending,” reverses our usual logic of avoiding suffering and seeking pleasure. In tonglen practice, we visualize taking in the pain of others with every in-breath and sending out whatever will benefit them on the out-breath. In the process, we become liberated from age-old patterns of selfishness. We begin to feel love for both ourselves and others; we begin to take care of ourselves and others. Breathe in for all of us and breathe out for all of us. [1]

The four stages of tonglen meditation practice:

1. Rest your mind briefly, for a second or two, in a state of openness or stillness. This stage is traditionally called opening to basic spaciousness and clarity.

2. Begin the visualization. Breathe in a feeling of hot, dark, and heavy, and breathe out a feeling of cool, bright, and light—a sense of freshness. Do this until it feels synchronized with your in- and out-breaths.

3. Focus on a personal situation. Think about any painful situation that’s real to you. Traditionally you begin by doing tonglen for someone you care about and wish to help. If you are stuck, you can do the practice for the pain you are feeling and simultaneously for all those just like you who feel that kind of suffering. For instance, if you are feeling inadequate, you breathe that in for yourself and all the others in the same boat, and you send out confidence and adequacy or relief in any form you wish.

4. Expand your compassion. Make the taking in and sending out bigger. If you are doing tonglen for someone you love, extend it out to those who are in the same situation. Make it bigger than just that one person. You could do tonglen for people you consider to be your enemies—those who hurt you or hurt others. Do tonglen for them, thinking of them as having the same confusion and stuckness as your friend or yourself. Breathe in their pain and send them relief. [2]

[1] Pema Chödrön, “How to Practice Tonglen,” Lion’s Roar: Buddhist Wisdom for Our Time (August 26, 2020). Available at https://www.lionsroar.com/how-to-practice-tonglen/

[2] Pema Chödrön, When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times, 20th anniversary ed. (Shambhala: 2016), 95–96